This is a cross-post from the sensree.com blog post by the same name. I don't typically cross-post, but this one is a follow-up to my son's recent medical scare and it seemed appropriate to put it here.
I shouldn't be surprised that a traumatic event such as abdominal surgery can trigger a regression in proprioception integration. As a result of my son's recent surgery, Q has become fearful of anything touching his torso because it is too close to his scar. Two days after we came home from the hospital, he melts down at when we talk about washing the adhesive from the electrodes. I just know it's going to drip on my scar!
I've been hesitant to push so soon after the surgery, but the time will come where we're going to have to work through the fear and tactile sensation in the area surrounding, not on, his abdominal scar.
I try to normalize it for him. I show him my scars from foot surgery so many years ago. And our dog has a similar scar from her surgery where we had her broken fixed. These help to a degree. Still, when it's just Q and the mirror, he shares with me that his scar looks scary, especially around his belly button, and he doesn't like it. We talk about Halloween, his favorite holiday, and how cool it is to have something 'scary' all year round. That didn't work as well as I hoped.
We're planning a scar party in the spring, after he's had a chance to heal and the redness goes away. Everyone with a scar will be invited to tell their stories. Everyone without a scar will get one drawn upon them if they like, and can pick a funny story about how they got it from a hat. We're all inclusive around here. I think it will be good. I hope so. Eventually, he's going to have to come to terms that this beautiful reminder that he's a survivor is now part and parcel of who he is. But Spring is a long time away.
While we were still in the hospital, I looked for something that might help. Q's a bookworm, so it was a no-brainer to start there. I found this book, and it arrived the weekend after we got home. Q seemed to really respond to it.
He's healing very well physically. Emotionally, it's a bit slower, but he's progressing every day. This isn't a typical sensory book, but if your sensory child has to deal with a scars from any source, this may help them figure out how to accept it.
How do you explain scars to a child? With kindness, honesty, and sensitivity. This unique book explains scars and the physical changes and emotional reactions they cause. Colorful illustrations help the journey with this difficult topic.
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